Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Beautiful Disaster

Hit 10 blunts in hopes of waking up to a new reality. It didnt work. Is this really life for me?
I cant sleep my troubles haunt my thoughts. I have no answers to these questions I have sought.
Im a fuck up I cant seem to get it right. Making dark decisions when Im the epitome of bright. Lord I know you know that im really trying. (God please let me get through these words without crying.)
Im hurting and my past has made my present really blurry. And whats worse is that I drink til I no longer worry. Im failing or rather that im losing. In this game called life slow death is what im choosing. Im bruising or better stated ive been bruised. My heart is the victim which has badly been abused. No excuses simply just disturbed facts. Im looking for some peace in my life its what I lack. Peace of soul peace of heart and mainly peace of mind. A little peace of self is what I cant seem to find.
Im far from perfect. Perfects never even heard of me. Im just hanging on to hope of what one day I can be. A better person. And everyday i learn what it takes for me to reach that and what it takes for me to burn.
Bare with me cuz I promise you Ill get there, I just need the chance to do it and to know that you still care. Im broken but im on my way to whole again. This will all be in the past soon til we reminisce. Remember when...

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